If I had £1 for every time a couple apologised to me for being “awkward”, I’d probably have enough to buy myself another camera lens.
It’s almost always one of the first things I hear before a booking. “We’re so awkward.” “I’m really camera shy.” “You’ll have to tell us exactly what to do.” Sometimes it’s said with a laugh, and sometimes it’s said with genuine worry, as though they’re about to fail some sort of test.
The funny thing is, almost every couple says it. Yet almost every couple leaves saying exactly the same thing too.
“That was actually so much fun.”
Why does almost everyone feel camera shy?
The truth is, most of us simply aren’t used to being in front of a professional camera. We spend our lives taking photos of holidays, birthdays and our dogs, but very rarely do we become the subject ourselves. So when someone points a camera at us, it’s completely normal to feel a little self-conscious.
Being camera shy doesn’t mean you’re awkward, unphotogenic or destined to hate every photo of yourself. It usually just means you’re doing something unfamiliar. Just like learning to dance, speaking in front of a crowd or trying a new hobby, it feels uncomfortable simply because it’s new. I include a lot of guidance with you leading up to your session and more tips in this blog.
We’ve been taught that being “photogenic” is something you’re born with
Somewhere along the way we’ve convinced ourselves that there are two kinds of people. The effortlessly photogenic ones who always know what to do, and the rest of us who panic the moment someone reaches for a camera.
I don’t believe that’s true.
What we often see online are the finished photographs, not the laughter in between, the slightly awkward first five minutes or the gentle guidance from behind the camera. You’re comparing your first few minutes of nervousness to someone else’s final gallery.
It’s hardly a fair comparison.
You don’t need experience. You just need to show up.
One of my favourite things to tell couples is that you don’t need to arrive knowing how to pose. In fact, I’d much rather you didn’t. Just show up ready to have fun and connect with each other.
Your engagement session isn’t an audition. There isn’t a right or wrong way to stand, smile or hold your partner’s hand. My job isn’t to expect you to know what you’re doing. It’s to guide you in a way that feels natural, comfortable and true to the two of you.
If you’re camera shy, that’s perfectly okay. You don’t need to fix that before we meet. You simply need to come as you are.
Why your engagement session feels more like a date than a photoshoot
One of the biggest misconceptions about engagement sessions is that you’ll spend an hour staring into the camera while trying to remember where your hands are supposed to go.
The reality couldn’t be more different.
We’ll go for a walk, stop when the light is beautiful, chat about your wedding plans and probably laugh at least a few times. I’ll give you little prompts rather than rigid poses, encouraging you to move, talk and simply enjoy spending time together. Before long, most couples stop thinking about the camera altogether.
That’s usually the moment the magic happens.
Your photographer isn’t looking for perfection
I think this is something that surprises people.
When I look through my camera, I’m not searching for the perfect smile or checking whether every strand of hair is in exactly the right place. I’m looking for connection. The way your partner makes you laugh. The little glance you share when you think nobody’s watching. The comfort of simply being together.
Those are the photographs that still make you smile years later.
You don’t need to become someone else to create beautiful images. You just need to give yourself permission to be present with the person you love.
Almost every couple starts the same way
After years of photographing couples, I can confidently say that feeling camera shy is probably the rule rather than the exception.
The first few minutes are often filled with nervous laughter and comments like, “Are we doing this right?” Then something shifts. You settle into conversation, you stop thinking about where your hands are, and you start paying attention to each other instead of the lens.
By the end of the session, couples are often surprised by how relaxed they feel. Many even tell me they forgot the camera was there.
You don’t have to be confident before your engagement session
If you’re waiting until you feel completely confident before booking your engagement session, you might be waiting forever.
Confidence doesn’t always come first. More often than not, confidence grows because you’ve had the experience. Once you’ve realised that having your photo taken can actually feel relaxed, enjoyable and even a little magical, you stop carrying quite so much fear into the next session or your wedding day.
That’s one of the reasons I love engagement sessions so much. They aren’t just about creating beautiful photographs. They’re about giving you the space to realise that maybe you weren’t as camera shy as you thought after all. Which is why I include them in every wedding collection.
Final Thoughts
If you’ve ever found yourself saying, “We’re so awkward,” I hope this has reassured you that you’re in very good company.
Almost every couple I photograph arrives feeling a little nervous. They worry they’ll look stiff, won’t know what to do or simply aren’t photogenic enough. Yet time and time again, they leave having spent an hour laughing together, slowing down and enjoying each other’s company.
Being camera shy doesn’t mean you can’t have beautiful photographs. It simply means you’re human.
And helping you feel comfortable enough to forget the camera? That’s my job.
If you’re a bit hesitant to book your photographer out of fear of being awkward in your photos, I would love to book a chat with you to talk through anything you’re feeling nervous about and to help reassure you that once you show up, it will all turn out okay. 🧡
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